I remember

A post about the anniversary of 9/11 was one of the last posts I made on my old blog. It's hard to believe that was 3 years ago, and even harder to believe that 9/11 was eight years ago. So much has changed for me personally in the past 8 years -my job (twice) , my address (twice), my status as an aunt (twice) and my status as a parent ( twice? almost.)

It's amazing though, how much I remember about that day eight years ago.

I remember-
the blue skies that day...that my co-worker Alaina was the one to tell me what was going on...calling Kevin to make sure he was watching TV...receiving calls from friends and family who couldn't believe what had happened and who just wanted to talk to the people they loved...the L&C tower being evacuated....the panic on everyone's face as they looked up at the roofs of buildings....

I remember-
getting out of downtown with Sandy for lunch...trying (and failing) to act normally during a job interview I had that afternoon.. the pinstripe jacket I wore to the interview....the long lines at the gas pumps...Keisha coming over to watch the coverage...the peace rally...how strangers spoke to each other in the elevator the next day... a friend's child's drawing of a plane and a building...

I remember-

how scared I was when I flew 3 weeks later...how 107.5 played the Star-Spangled Banner every morning for a while afterwards....feeling lucky...and then guilty about feeling lucky....Tom Brokaw crying (did that really happen?)...and all the missing posters.

May we never forget. God bless us all.

Me again

Oh, how I wanted to be a parent, but oh how I did not want to be a parent that lost my identity completely, that put everything about me aside. So I'm glad to be back here. Yeah, it took me 6 months to get back here, but I'm here. And I want to talk about -of all things- politics. ?! Yes, politics.

I have never been very political. OK, to be completely honest, I've been downright apathetic. I have in the past, ashamedly, had the opinion that whether the President was a Democrat or a Republican had little bearing on me personally. I have never felt terribly strongly one way or the other. My knee-jerk reaction was always to say that I am a Democrat, but if pressed, I would have had trouble articulating the reasons why.

During the last election, though, I decided to do some research and try to fully understand my knee-jerk party affiliation. I decided to poll all of my Republican friends and acquaintances to see why they were voting for McCain. This is a sampling of what I got:

"He's a war hero." That alone didn't convince me.
"He's been around forever." Again, not moved.
"He's old. It's his last chance. Obama has plenty of time to be elected. " Seriously?
"I feel bad for him. He's a little old man. He can't even comb his hair." Pity? That's a reason?
"I'm scared of Obama. I think he is a Muslim."

I finally gave up. Oh, I heard a few arguments that were better articulated, but nothing convincing. And the majority of the arguments I heard were similar to the crap above.

Today I tried again. After I read the transcript of Obama's speech in Cairo, I decided to get the opinion of two people I work with that I knew would have some criticism. I was generally interested in hearing their side. I thought, "Maybe I'm missing something." I am, admittedly, not a student of politics. Maybe I could learn something, I foolishly thought.

I listened to them bash the speech and Obama for a few minutes. Then I asked, ,"So you watched the speech?" They hadn't. "Oh, well I didn't watch it either. I read the transcript. Did you read the transcript?" They hadn't.

AARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH

They said they didn't like the way "things feel." They thought that Obama had deep seated roots in Islam. That he was secretly a Muslim. They scoffed at his use of "assalaamu alaykum." They snorted at the fact that he quoted from the Koran, and said he probably didn't quote from the Bible. ( He did.) They talked about how he once said that that America wasn't a Christian nation. They really went on about that one. I don't know if he said it or not. Maybe he did. But are we? As much as we might want to be, are we? Are we really? Yes, somewhere between 70-80% of Amercians say they are Christians. But are 70-80% of the people you come in contact with every day Christians? Look around. Does it look like a Christian nation to you? Do I want the leader of our country to be a Christian? Sure. But can you or I ever really be sure if they really are?

Anyway, I was disappointed again. They spew so much criticisim of Obama and the people who voted for him. They say those people are stupid, and then give stupid reasons like the ones I've listed here.

Maybe we're all stupid.

O.K. this post has run out of steam.

More later. Hopefully not six months later, but later.

I never run out of quotes

At times the world can seem an unfriendly and sinister place, but believe us when we say that there is much more good in it than bad. All you have to do is look hard enough. And what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may, in fact, be the first steps of a journey...

~Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events

You know the thing about chaos. It's fair.

Do you know what I know?

Said the night wind to the little lamb,
Do you see what I see?
Way up in the sky, little lamb?
Do you see what I see?

A star, a star, dancing in the night,
With a tail as big as a kite,
With a tail as big as a kite.

Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy,
Do you hear what I hear?
Ringing through the sky shepherd boy,
Do you hear what I hear?

A song, a song, high above the tree,
With a voice as big as the sea,
With a voice as big as the sea.

Said the shepherd boy to the mighty king,
Do you know what I know?
A child, a child, shivers in the cold,
Let us bring him silver and gold,
Let us bring him silver and gold.

Said the king to the people everywhere,
Listen to what I say,
Pray for peace people everywhere,
Listen to what I say.

The child, the child, sleeping in the night,
He will bring us goodness and light.
The child, the child, sleeping in the night,
He will bring us goodness and light.


I hope this Christmas season during all the hustle and bustle that you take a second and know what I know -that God is good, and that we are all blessed.

Once there were two women,
who barely knew each other.
One you don't know yet,
the other you call Mother.

Two different lives shaped to make yours one
One became your guiding star,
The other became your sun.

The first gave you life,
and the second taught you to live in it.
The first gave you a need for love,
And the second was there to give it.

One gave you emotions,
The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
The other dried your tears.

One gave you up - it was all that she could do.
The other prayed for a child,
And God led her straight to you.

So, you ask me one day, heredity or environment
what are you the product of?

Neither, my darling, neither.

Just two different kinds of love.

-Anonymous